Thursday, October 18, 2007

Hairy, chaatas

I'm not one for making deeply studied observations. But on occasion I do read some stuff and wonder about things. Agar aisa hota to kaisa hota. Two things regular Drifters recently pointed out gave me much cause to think.

First, Anu G informed us that Pooja Bhatt had cast Himesh Reshammiya in her new film. Let's ignore the seismic amusement value of this for just a second. The report featured Pooja defending Himesh's baldness, which to be noted is no longer an issue.

Here's Pooja on this topic: "I don't know why hair is such an issue in this world. I am married to a man who is bald".

Next, this news about turning method acting on its head via email from Mind Rush. Director Sami, while shooting his new Tamil flick, slapped his actress Padmapriya so she would emote better.

Here's Padmapriya: "He called it a day and we packed. Suddenly, he just slapped me. It was unprovoked and I was shocked,"

Here's Sami: "I slapped her because she did not emote. It's nothing new in the industry. We have our own tensions."

The first thought that occurred to me was that women really have it tough in this industry.

Can you imagine Pooja saying something like "Well, I know Rani's put on 100lbs since her last movie. But hey, I don't know why weight is such an issue in this world - just look at S(tr)aberi! Rani still looks hot, I'm going to cast her as a lead opposite Shahid Kapoor in my next movie and have her and Chhotu run around trees"

Or if Sami were to slap a male actor - say the world's greatest entertainer - Rajnikant. Would he dare? I can see Rajnikant throwing a cigarette up in the air, lighting a maachis by striking it on the director's nose, setting the poor guys sideburns on fire, catching the cigarette in his mouth, grabbing the director's phet, yanking his head down and lighting his smoke.

This would never happen. Why? Because if entertainment like this were possible, why would anyone watch movies?

Also:

47 comments:

sanjay said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
girlie girl said...

Awesome post as usual, Aspi! I cannot believe this Sami guy slapped the actress...that's Terrible! I love the whole Rajnikant story though...I can totally see him doing that! lol! I cant believe Pooja Bhatt is casting Him-Bald-Ass for her new movie. I mean, it's not like her movies are such success that she can cast the worst people and still get a hit. She can barely make a good movie with successful, full-head-of-hair actors, I dont know how disasterous this is going to turn out!!

Musing said...

I loved the first part of the article. I think Himesh is one of the best things to happen to entertainment. SRGMP would have been booorrrrrriiiiiinnnnggggg without him. Look at ASVOI, althought Abhijeet tries to imitate Himesh, he falls seriously short of the panache and finesse of a Himesh. I would like Pooja to also star in her own film and try shouting it out with Himesh in the emotion filled Climax scene..guaranteed recipe for a super duper masala hit.


The second piece of news is extremely disturbing. Its not that this has not happened in India and the Indian film industry before. But, the retribution meted out was good. Maybe we need more such things happening all over the place for the testestrone filled Indian male to realize that its "not OK" to slap or abuse ladies. Its a seriously non-amusing trait..

Gents, pls. practice non-violence and non-abuse on the ladies too. Else, the day is not far..

-musing.

Joules said...

This is my favourite video of Rajnikant.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XgflJpGojaI

The guy has coolness written all over him.

Joules said...

We indians like our super heroes to have hair. What do AB and King Khan have in common - a good head of hair.

Pooja knows it and will wait for Hima$$ transplant to work.

On other Bollywood news - Saif has announced that he and Kareena are together. Surprise, surprise ;-)

girlie girl said...

Wow...Kareena has a thing for short men, huh?! Well, atleast Saif is not as feminine looking as Shahid was, so I say, You go Girl!

Priti said...

While we are at that girlie girl, just wanted to mention Saif simply has it for newer pastures. While the channels are screaming about "Chhote nawab's" new found love, nawab sa'ab is busy demonstrating the romantic side of "a nawab"! Isse hi nawabi andaaz kehti hain....

Anonymous said...

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Anonymous said...

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From Anon

Manish said...

Well Aspi, you missed Pooja Bhatt and the chaata connection. Just a few months back, Pooja, the Directoress of Dhokha, slapped the hero Muzamil Ibrahim right on the sets - he too couldn't emote.

musing said...

Hey Anonymous,

Tell your good friend Jworth that one day I hope to have as much courage of conviction as him.

Truly inspiring, I appreciate you providing the link to his blog.

Thanks.

-musing.

Aspi said...

Joules, that vid is hilarious even though I didn't understand the dialogues.

Manish, who knew! Thanks for the link.

Joules said...

Aspi, I don't understand the dialogues either (I am from North India) which makes it funnier for me. The link was originally sent to me by a caucasian friend who thought the dancer in the video was totally smokin'.

m said...

how dare that pooja beatch slap my Muzzammil???

Leera said...

Excellent post aspi. If drift were a magazine, i would have a subscription. (provided there was an annual himanshu special with a glossy fold out poster)
Btw now that kareena and the sloppy kisser have parted ways, who's promoting Jab we met?

Kanan said...

I think the real life chaatas suck bad. Physical abuse must stop every where on this earth to move one step forward towards the idea of world peace. I hate those chaatas that teachers lagaaofy to students too. Can't stand 'em. *ugh* I wish in India the chaatees could sue the chaaters. That would be awesome, dude! If not that then at least make the chaaters go behind the bars for a day or two. But on the other hand, the on screen chaatas are awesome.. not the kinds that we saw in Hey Bhaabhii but the Lamhe (with love from Anil Kapoor to Sridevi) and DDLJ (from Amrish Puri to SRK) kinds. I remember there was one in Mohabbatein also (from Amrish Puri to Jimmy Shergil). What an awesome chaata!! totally mind-blowing err I mean face-blowing. ;)

And coming to the hairy part, I think it's a desi thing. Desi women go gaga over hairy harrys. lol or I should say most of them. I've seen a lot of new generation women not liking the mooch, etc. so may be the trend will change in coming days but for now.. the Bhaaloos rule the Taaloos I mean Takloos any day. :D

musing said...

Kanan,

Just checked in. Very well put!! Bravo !!

I had to laugh at this part..LOL

-a musing.

Mind Rush said...

all I have to say to Sami: "One year in jail will fix your sexism."

Shekhar Ki Deewani said...

Speakiin of real life Chaatas..has anyone gone thru domestic abuse??
i have had a really traumatic experience wid my ex bf....:(

Shekhar Ki Deewani said...

And about Hairy guys...well i personally like guys wid hair...but must stress dat ppl do like baldies nowadays...like vishal dadlani...

Saritha said...

The worst of part of the whole issue is that the director thinks it's 'OK' to slap a heroine.

From the post - Here's Sami: "I slapped her because she did not emote. It's nothing new in the industry. We have our own tensions."

Mohan babu's notorious reputation precedes him.
http://movies.indiainfo.com/southern-spice/topstory/shilpa.html

Shekhar Ki Deewani said...

Arre this is nothing,
Vidhu Vinod Chopra even bit the hand of his heroine neha when shooting for a movie[the one wid bobby deol...because she was raising the wrong hand for a dance sequence...just to remind her which hand to raise..
another south indian director made his heroine parade stark naked in front of the entire crew while shooting becuz she objected to a bedroom scene...now tell me..arent chataas better???

Saritha said...

Which south Indian director made his heoine parade stark naked???????????

Shekhar Ki Deewani said...

Sorry, I cannot take his name..I know dis from my high profile sources...some very senior guy..and a yesteryear actress..mostly in late 70s early 80s...

Joules said...

Come on, in that I blame the actress as much as the director.

If you are ready to do anything for a role, there always will be someone to take advantage of you.

Kanan, On the mooch thing I have always wondered we have never had actors who have mustaches since early days. And with our societies penchant to imitate the actors/actresses where does this love for mustache come from?

Joules said...

If you want to see chaatas watch some tv soaps. Everyone gets slapped at some point or the other.

Aspi said...

On the other hand, I know some actresses who have mouches.

Joules said...

LOL!!!

Yeah, my husband does'nt like Kajol for that reason.

Shekhar Ki Deewani said...

Lol...i remember Kajol in Baazigar...she had not even done her eye brows..ehehe..
btw, spkin of baazigar...remember how Shahrukh was ???
http://movies.sulekha.com/hindi/baazigar/pictures/7.htm

see now what hez evolved into wid OSO....Is it jus me of he now luks like Mick Jagger...:-S

girlie girl said...

He looks disgusting in OSO, I think. I used to think Shahrukh was so good looking, not so much anymore!

Saritha said...

kajol has mouch??hmmm,I'll watch DDLJ this weekend and will talk.

Now here's the real 'Rani' of bollywood.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-zIw-U6rKnA&mode=related&search=

Sridevi-SOmeone said her beauty is like old wine,it gets better as yrs go by.

Madhuri - The dancing Diva
Juhi has the best comic timing.

m said...

i could never like madhuri, like i don';t hate her but never went ga ga over her. I hated 90's movies. I tried to sit through a couple of them last year but just couldn't handle it. Too many bad clothes, loud acting, big hair etc also almost every movie had a "balatkar" attempt. Hated it

OzAngel said...

I agree Megan. I much prefer Juhi to Madhuri- although the cutesie/ faux innocence of the 90s feels really out of place in today's world. I find when I try to watch something 'old' like Raju Ban Gaya Gentleman or something, I just can't connect with the movie. It's like, people changed with the times, and you just don't have the same sorts of themes relevant in your lives anymore. In fact, I prefer reallllly old movies to 90s movies... cos in the ancient ones, there's like a novelty aspect- its like you're watching history. But the 90s is a period close enough to feel unconfortably outdated.

Just some ramblings. (I can't wait to watch the L'il Chimps on telly tonight) OzAngel NEEDS to see Vishal on telly soon! Seriously, how cool was the guy!?

Aspi said...

m and ozangel, I'm with both of you on this one. I missed the 90s in India so I don't get it anyways.

Saritha said...

It so true,ozangel.People change with times.We're talking abt the movies & people we never met,I can't relate to my own pic taken a few yrs ago.I can't stop laughing everytime I look at family pics taken during my cousin's wedding in '90.Zari sarees,huge bindis covering 3/4th of the forehead,rani pink silk salwar kameez-oh tackiness at its best.

I love my parents b/w pic taken in a studio in 70's where dad's wearing a bell bottom.Now, that brings smile to my face.

So,may be I prefer to ignore madhuri's tacky dressing and watch her dance numbers.And I can't wait to see 'Aaja nachle'.

Shekhar Ki Deewani said...

Well...sorry guys...the 90s had their own attraction...atleast i enjoyed it..[i was a kid]...lol...that was the era which introduced Suniel Shetty and Akshay Kumar to the industry...Govinda shed his hero image and embraced the Dada Kondke style...Karisma luked like a Chakka...the word 'Sexy' was bludy controversial..hehehhe....Salman luked a Bombeel..[all Mumbaikars know wat dat is]...Anil adopted the corny hero look...[Laadla, Tejaab, Kishan Kanhaiya, hifazat.etcetc]...Jaggudada was in his own world of 'intelliegent' movies...[angaar, and a few others]...and ooh..i almost forgot the girly man Saif...ROFL ..watchin Ole Ole was the best pastime those days...Raveena was the 'Hot' item...[mast mast girl]....Divya Bahrti committed suicide...Rishi Kapoor tried his level best to compete wid the new brood...tired camoflaugin his 'Tond' wid intricately designed pullovers...[Bol Radha Bol...Saajan ka Ghar..Deewana]...Hahaha...Sharukh luked like a dark pufferfish in all his 90s movies....dunno wat suddenly happened to him after dat...Kajol was the prude of dem all..no groomin watsoever...no to ferget Pooja Bhat...mann no comments..den we had 'the' hot movies like DDLJ...and HAHK...dunno wat was gud about dem...denw e also had those B grade movies...mostly action..which had to have a rape scene in them...and the victim had to be the hero's sister...and all of dem committd suicide or went crazy...this increasinly led to sudden increase in the casting couch syndrome...we also had soem patriotic movies..starrin nana patekar....god knows whr did he disappear now...gees also manisha koirala....she was a cute girl...now totally lost in de world of sex....phew...a lot of things to talk about...but..i enjoyed de 90s:)

Aspi said...

SkD, I didn't think it would be possible - but you just created a 90s Bollywood time capsule. Now I feel caught up. Thanks!

Shekhar Ki Deewani said...

hehehe..thanks Aspi...didnt know u wud read thru that load of crap.

Sidekick said...

i get the sense that (and am open to being corrected on this!) tamil films have had a tendency to glorify machoism - the hero with the ubiquitous mooch is one such manifestation. sometimes this takes extreme forms like the hero slapping his girl ostensibly to 'correct' her for some sort of inappropriate behavior. the whole thing is cast as a case of 'spare the rod and spoil the child' except this is usually a grown woman being shown the rod! perhaps in this instance sami had trouble telling reel and real worlds apart.... not justifying it in the least, but maybe a case where glorifying the wrong values leads to dysfunctional social behavior.

If it indeed it's simply a case of power dynamics, then i wonder why the case of pooja bhatt slapping her actor on set isn't creating the same brouhaha and outrage? seems like this issue shd be gender independent.

as for the hairy part of this post - my personal take: our heroes' faces could use regular 'brushes' with their razors. for instance i think kunal kapoor has much cuteness potential if only he would give that razor a fair chance :)

Shekhar Ki Deewani said...

The South Indian film industry is indeed obsessed with the moonch as well as bimbos wid huge tits...not only does it glorify machoism, but also degrades women greatly by relegating her role to 'pretty' sex object...i prefer bollywood anytime...atleast the heroes are goodlooking opposite the heroines...unlike the south where its simply impossible to imagine how and why would a very pretty girl fall in love wid a monkey/hippo cross....
as far as kunal is concerned...to me he luks like those clowns on stilts...and his nose luks more like a beak...ditto wid Hrithik....[only the nose bit]...

Aspi said...

sidekick, excellent analysis! Boy, we've got another Mind Rush on this blog - which I really like.

I haven't watched too may Tollywood flicks (can I say that) because I'm uncomfortable analyzing out of my league in a language I don't natively understand). But I've been watching stuff on YouTube.

Aspi said...

SkD, to be fair if there is one thing I'm gratful to the SI film industry, it is that it has always celebrated voluptuous women instead of women who look like Chicken Satay appetizers.

Sidekick said...

shukriya, drift saab... this is high praise indeed since i love mind rush's posts but i lack the light, witty touch with which mind rush handles the deep analysis!

SKD, i agree entirely that bollywood gives women the best eye candy but i wouldn't be too quick to tar the entire south indian film industry with the same brush in terms of quality. malayalam cinema tackles some very sensitive themes with great subtlety and skill. also in defense of tamil cinema, at least in the last couple of years the industry has managed to find a formula that balances commercial and critical acclaim. granted these films form a small proportion of the total no of films that get made but still where bollywood struggles to find audiences for such critical darlings as manorama SFU, johnny gaddar or black friday, this is no mean feat.

aspi, the language is a stumbling block but these days subtitling is decent and while something is lost in translation some regional films are still worth a dekko.

Saritha said...

Two things.

Sidekick,always loved ur analysis.All those ideas are worth a post.

Aspi,Tollywood refers to Telugu film industry and kollywood is tamil industry(my guess).Count on ur SI friends,if you need any help with reginal cinema.:)

Sidekick said...

Thanks much, Saritha. Maybe someday i'll summon the courage for a post, but for now i enjoy reading and commenting.

also, thought Tollywood referred to bengali cinema coz studios were concentrated in the Tollywood area in Calcutta. Kollywood defi points to tamil cinema - Kodambakkam in Madras was the traditional hub of studios.

Aspi said...

Hmmm...I see a guide to the Ollywoods coming up.

Shekhar Ki Deewani said...

Guys guys guys...chill..i have nothing against the south women....please dey r way prettier dan the sick bollywood 'babes'.......in fact i like it that they promote real women....but the guys suck!!!!....