Namaste India, by corporate

Early on while on my favorite route to India, my neighbor across the aisle - someone who looked like Moby flipped open his laptop.

Usually when this happens I always keep a corner of my eye on the computer because I'm interested in seeing what people use in terms of software. ("Hey, who knew Lotus Notes was still around").

When Moby loaded his email, I looked away as is the polite thing to do. But then he threw this presentation on his screen called "India: A cultural introduction". And then Moby adjusted himself sideways in his seat with his back to me and the screen in full view. I saw this as a sign of fate and decided to nefariously intrude on my fellow passenger's privacy by reading along.

After the requisite pictures of the Taj Mahal, Fatehpur Sikri, a woman playing a veena, another doing yoga - came the serious stuff. This turned out to be pithy bullet points that seemed to be written with the intent of prepping the one minute manager on an entire culture.

Since I was already being neech enough in my intrusion I decided to raise the stakes and took some notes which I thought I'd share. Here were some of the bullets that struck me as being hugely amusing (and I'm barely even going to mention the slide which listed equivalent terms such as "car trunk = car dickey")

• A namaste may be followed by a handshake. A limp handshake does not mean insincerity (picture of Aish executing a namaste)


• Learning is by association because of rote learning


• Never challenge religion of social structures


• If meeting the same person again, it is not ok to greet him or her again


• Personal feelings, intuition and faith are more pursuasive than objective reasoning. Build faith


• Punctuality is appreciated but not practised


• Wobbling head from side to side means active listening and not disagreement


• Women need to cover their head and dress conservatively before entering

Hopefully Moby won't be surprised by any of this. In fact, if I see him again, I'll be sure to recommend this new book I've discovered recently, by that paragon of social journalism Shobha De, called Superstar India.

Also:

• Nikhil recommends IndiaMike and ThornTree for more such comments



• Joules' visiting friend asks some probing questions



• girlie girl has an answer



• meena's colleague lauds the Indian government for Horn OK Please



• leera thinks Shobha De's new book sounds wicked good



• Mind Rush's top 5 India survival tips



• m on how desis have to announce their roots



• Bobble-head moves remind Kama of bullocks



• Lack of bathroom TP drives Joules crazy



• Mind Rush recommends tightly packed pocket seat covers



• girlie girl recommends wet naps and hand sanitizer