Tuesday, May 26, 2009

More Ads that annoy me - Part 3

Crabtree Switches

Rajat Kapoor is about to pull out of his driveway. He waves his finger at the electrician about to perform work in his house. "Make sure its Crabtree switches, ok" he smiles.

His wife - a well coiffed late-twentyish chick chides him. "Rajat!" she tsk-tsks "When will you learn? A switch is just a switch!" Here she uses the universally annoying air quotes gesture - so expertly skewered and forced into the lexicon of the passé years ago by David Spade on Saturday Night Live .

What does Rajat do? The gentleman that he is - he swallows hard and does nothing. In fact he keeps driving on.

"Tum bhi na" his wife continues to heckle him.

Later Rajat proposes some tea. His wife agrees. He stops at a chai ka galla, where sweaty, scruffy - and you know - poor people are enjoying tea.

"Here?!" says wifey incredulously.

"Why not?" says Rajat, "Tea is tea". More air quotes.

Wife smiles sheepishly.

Commercial Payload:
Rich men might be smug but they know what they want
Rich men prefer Crabtree switches
Wouldn't you much rather be a 'rich' person than poor riff raff?

BSNL Broadband

A party is at hand. A guy flanked by two chicks can't get his internet connection to - uh, perform. The girls are getting annoyed. Clearly the guy isn't getting laid tonight.

The camera pans to another guy - only this time its a dude. How can you tell? Well he's got better hair and is wearing a jacket. He is also flanked by two women. But they are both really happy? Why? Because he is showing them a high speed Internet video of a girl dancing.

Dude starts rapping. What is he talking about? Social Issues? Gangsta life? Love and loss?

Nope. He's extolling the virtues of BSNL Broadband - a whopping 2 Mb per second. Whoot! Can you say superfast!

Often the dude breaks into an accent, throws cool sounding words around and jabs his pinky and thumb at a laptop. Pretty soon the girls who flank the loser walk over to the dude's end of the room to hang with him.

But wait, there's more. There is a tremendously choreographed dance, the flagship step of which appears to be bringing two hands together in the front like you are patting a mincemeat kebab.

Commercial Payload:
Chicks dig guys with laptops
But they dig dudes with 2 Mbps broadband more
BSNL Broadband will get you laid


Satyajit said...

let me know what you think of this:

Kokonad said...

Heh heh heh! Nice one, Aspi! :) Love the prequels to this too!

Zeenat Rasheed said...


Just discovered your blog today and I have to say that I'm doing cartwheels of excitement at having found a Bollywood blog that's interesting, credible, up to date and in coherent English!

Unfortunately I can't get Dish Network, so I'm stuck with watching crappy soaps and B movies from the '70s on Comcast's Zee broadcast. Your blog will really help me keep in touch with what's happening in desi TV and Bollywood. Thanks!

Mind Rush said...

Drift saab, hope you have good defamation insurance.

Those "switches" and 2MB are coming to sue the Drift....You make the ads seem so darn funny, and ridiculous.

And, Xinu, welcome! Drift saab works hard so your Dish does not have to....

Unknown said...

Xinu, welcome!

Anonymous said...

and you get drift for FREE!!!!!!

Priya said...

oh gawd, what craptastic picks.

the air quotes make me wanna puke.

the second one was just sad. i would never be caught dead wrapping to bsml.

jasleen said...

I can so see the point you make about the first commercial; the second commercial is just plain suffering from creative drought!

Anonymous said...

and then there are these ads!

Unknown said...

Heh. That looks so nutty - it feels made up.