Tuesday, November 17, 2009

New Saas-Bahu TV: Inspired by ads!

Just the other day, suffering from Dus Ka Dum withdrawal, I turned on the TV to watch some songs. A commercial break ensued. The commercial had a woman twiddling a mobile. Hmm, I thought, an ad for Nokia maybe. A few moments later I noticed massive pimples on the woman's face. Hmm, I thought, an ad for zit cream maybe? Neither! The whole shebang turned out to be an ad for a saas-bahu serial.

So what is the difference between a saas-bahu premise promo and a commercial? None! I spent the major part of an hour watching the promos for saas-bahu serials and each time they looked like an advert for something. My hats off to the writers of the serials who can take a wafer-thin premise and turn it into a daily soap.

In any case I got down to thinking. Why not make the whole serial a massive commercial? Many advantages come to mind. First, there would be a ready sponsor - so the serial would come completely financed. Next, the premise would actually make sense. Third, heck its happening anyway - lets just make it official.

To get this whole idea started, I brainstormed a bit and came up with the following ideas for marrying sponsors and entire saas-bahu serials. The commercial is built in!

VIP Kkachhe Ka Kamaal

Anil is a loser because no chick will go out with him. Then one day his mates force him to play strip poker - which he proceeds to lose. Down to his underwear and near fatal humiliation something amazing happens. The  college princess - Avantika - walks over and says "Yeh to badaa toing hai!" Anil's confidence skyrockets and his life takes a turn.

Value proposition: Each episode deals with a crisis of confidence solved by donning a VIP underwear.

Nokia Teri Meri Baate

Arjun and Jasmine come from families that are in a long standing feud. But fate plays a hand. One day Jasmine dials the wrong number and connects with Arjun's mobile. They talk and fall in love. Unable to meet in person because of khandaani dushmani, they talk on the phone each day and plot to reunite their families.

Value proposition: Arjun and Jasmine talk in every episode using Nokia mobiles

Fair & Lovely Mere Aiyeene Mein

Gayatri is gorgeous, but she's dark. So no one will marry her. Worse her younger sister is the town hottie but has to turn down rishtaa after rishtaa while she waits in line (they are both from a 'traditional' family you see). About to commit suicide by jumping off a ledge, Gayatri notices a tube of F&L carelessly thrown nearby. Gayatri goes home and uses it. Boys start noticing her! But are they attracted to her personality or her light skin?

Value proposition: Fair & Lovely is featured promptly in every episode AND accompanied by hokey girl empowerment message about finding someone who loves you for what you are on the inside.

Tilda Basmati Daney Alag Bhojan Ek

The neighborhood of Patli Gali are a troubled lot - they belong to different religions. Not to mention talk in all kinds of funky accents. The Parsi dude is especially afflicted as he thinks everyone's name is dikra. Every festival brings out the worst in everyone. But one day an old Christian lady called Naani-amma (yes, heavy handed but this is a saas-bahu after all) makes a potful of fragrant basmati rice that is so sumptuous that everyone drops their jhagda and eats at the same table.

Value proposition: Each episode has a neighborhood dinner scene featuring a potful of steaming Tilda Basmati.

Mint-o Fresh Tere Saaso Ki Mahek

Mahek is a loser because no guy pays her attention. One day she finds a Mint-o Fresh in her pesky younger brother's shirt pocket and pops it into her mouth. Instantly a handsome guy throws himself at her feet. Mahek decides to use a Mint-o Fresh to run through all the boys she can lay her eyes on and find her true love.

Value proposition: Undesirable girl eats Minto-o Fresh and lands guys by the bushel. Yes, anyone can get laid - and its cheap!

Hajmola Khaate Peeta Ghar Ki Kahani

The Varma family head - Roy Varma - is a moneybags tycoon. But a heart attack lays him low and he has to call on his three sons - Joy, Boy and Toy - to run his business. Rivalries spring up instantly among the brothers and strike at the heart of this joint family. Into the lives of the Varma family enters a young, soft-spoken but firebrand cook called Haj Mola. Using his unique brand of Yoda-like wisdom and cunning, Haj Mola brings peace to the turmoil in the Varma family.

Value proposition: The classiness of metaphors is used to offset the fact that this is a commercial for Number Two relief.


Pitu said...

ROFL! Drift Sir, what are you doing in Amreeka? You should be in the des pitching these ideas or at least in Mexico conniving with the Telemundo peeps. I have an idea!

"Blogspot Ki Aflatoon Idea Factory"

In this show, various losers approach the camera and talk about why their lives suck.

Enter Chirantan Baba Blogger Saheb (that would be you) who solves each pesky problem with his vishesh tippani (presented as a blog post of course)and the losers are overjoyed. Everybody's dil is khush!

Unknown said...


I look like a Chirantan Baba to you?

Mind Rush said...

Drift saab, Pitu is right. We have a genius in you and you need to be on that Nokia calling Ekta Kapoor pornto!
But wot, Drift saar?! Hum ko bhool gaye? In the Varma family, it would be the pleasure of Mind Rush to live there and fix the likes of Joy, Toy, Boy and Roy....
Yaani ki, "No need for Asprin! Call Mind Rush!"

musical said...

Brilliant! Aspi ji, this is some creative genius! How do you come up with these fun ideas?

I am dreaming of something with a role especially written for Him bhaiyya :).

Kekta Kapoor said...

Aspi call me. I need you to think of a serial based on toothpaste for me. Close up is sponsoring.

Pitu said...

Aspi: Whether you look like a Chirantan Baba or not you need a bhari bharkam name. Aspi will just not do it. Chirantar nahi to, how about Nirantar Baba?

"Nokia calling Ekta Kapoor pornto!"

Mind Rush: Fredian slip? :D

Unknown said...

Pitu, this is true - the name must carry gravitas. I wonder how Prem Joshi does it though - that is such a lightweight name.

Mind Rush, I meant no offense. You are still our go to mind fixer.

Ekta, will respond shortly with a treatment.

Unknown said...

Kekta, let's see - how about we do a horror saas-bahu with the toothpaste treatment? No, I know all saas-bahu's may be horrifying - but I'm talking about real creepy stuff.

So there is a gorgeous bungalow that no one lives in. But some bakra or the other will always try to rent it. In the bathroom there is a toothpaste tube. When the renter brushes with it and smiles into the mirror, their image speaks back to them. The image reveals a secret about the person they love the most.

But the condition is that they cannot tell anyone about this secret - otherwise their teeth will yellow and fall off. Thus, lives are ruined!

Value proposition: Cautionary tale about brushing with cheap, no-name brand toothpastes. Thus always use sponsor's toothpaste.

Banno said...

Wouldn't be surprised if someone from the TV duniya or Ad duniya stole your ideas. :)

Anonymous said...

Banno, by now every sponsor is read this blog day in and day out.. Chirantan/Nirantan Baba is doing their creative dept job.
FYI, quite are few people who were paid high bucks have now been sent home with Mint-o fresh and have been frantically using their Nokia to land another job!!
I think in US even the Metlife ka ad would prosper well in the saas-bahu scenario, what do you think Chirantan Babu?

Unknown said...

musical, thanks for the support as always!

Banno and Anon, I stole those ideas from TV anyway - so it all comes full circle :)

Unknown said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
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