Aspi's Drift

Aamir and Zayed on Sa Re Ga Ma Pa Challenge 2009

2008-12-07T21:39:00.025-06:00

What with the strike and everything - none of the details of which I seem to be able to find anywhere - its been a while since we watched a new SRGMP episode.

But after a few weeks, and I'll admit the break was a good one, SRGMP returned with not one but two stars on back to back episodes. One was promoting a movie and the other was promoting khuda jaane what.

I've never been a fan of Zayed Khan - the only time I've watched him was when I went to see SRK in Main Hoon Na years ago. But I must say his appearance on SRGMP completely made a fan out of me. But I'm getting ahead of myself.

Zayed showed up on the Arabic special episode. This is a rather smart turn by the SRGMP producers because it gives them a chance to reuse all the props from the Qawwali, I mean Sufi episode.

Honking wine pots? Check! Huge golden balls with pointy bits sticking up? Check! Belly Dancer? Check! Harem Pants? Check! Half melted candles? Check! But this is entirely the greatness of my beloved show that the producers could have, but chose not to let their creativity stop there.

Also joining these props was a sand pit which replaced the usual stage. If that didn't take your breath away, a flat screen TV behind the singers constantly depicted videos of camels plodding in the desert. What do they say about cheesiness begets cheesy goodness? Towards the end Zayed picked up the mike and made some sadela joke about how those were shots of Bollywood actors crossing the desert to go to Oman to act in Asma's movie.

Speaking of Asma, SRGMP pretty much let that girl lose on the show. She co-hosted with Head, which is another way of saying she was on display for making fun of for an extended period of time. Why this special treatment? Khuda jaane! Probably this was the channel's way of making nice for the terrible roasting Asma had to endure a few weeks ago at the hands of her fellow contestants. Or perhaps SRGMP doesn't want to lose its Oman audience.

Back to the reason why I really liked Zayed. At one point Yashita Yashpal, who I should add with much fondness is continuing her love affair with wacky outfits, asked Zayed to come on stage and dance with her. And what does Zayed do? He bounds up on stage and immediately starts executing a Subhash Ghai type overwrought dance performance. There were ghutne-tek poses, shoulder shimmies and hip thrusts. Arms were thrown about. Much hopping ensued. Thus Zayed deftly promoted his upcoming Ghai movie and looked beyond his carefully constructed cool image to embrace his inner Bollywood junkie. How can anyone not love that?

In the very next episode, Aamir Khan showed up wearing a rumpled black jacket over jeans and a smart white shirt. Surely he was there to promote Ghajini? Nope, not a word from him about the movie. Instead we all had to wallow in Tare Zameen Par wimpiness for an hour. More discussions of adhuraness pervaded the mahol. At one point after Debojit had rendered the raundu song of the millenium - Maa - Aadesh Srivastava was so moved that he ordered Aamir and Shankar Mahadevan on stage. Then he saluted them. No, like with a proper military salute. What did Ma tell me about not acting out when drunk or moved? It always leads to regret later.

For a guy who is the most sought after actor in Bollywood, Aamir is fairly unassuming and business-like. And you can tell because he doesn't do anything that is supposed to look cute just because he is a superstar. Thankfully, he doesn't do any one ghisa pita thing or dialog to "entertain" us. (Hey Akshay, you listening? Time to ditch that laugh. Kareena, ditto with that "Bhatinda ki Sikhni" dialog) Instead he made some loose, mildly engaging jokes and kept the show going.

He was enough of a sport to sing Aati Kya Khandala on stage. He snuffed out a machees with his tongue. He endured some crazy ass bananas dancing by Debojit Dutta on stage. Later Aadesh brought out a drum kit which Aamir shakily played over Pappa Kehte Hai.

Chatoo Nation on Sa Re Ga Ma Pa Challenge 2009

2008-10-09T01:12:00.026-05:00

Happily the fine singing in SRGMP is still overshadowed by the ego blinging. Its called the best of both worlds. So what happened last week that was worth noting? A couple of things.

First, remember Debojit and how SRGMP did the whole cringeworthy "Debo is adhura" bit? Well that took a turn for the worse on Saturday. Here is how it all went down.

Pritam, who houses Debojit in his Dhoom gharana, has been touting the guy as his winner. This apparently led to some envy mongering among the other participants.

Now contestant bhailog, I need to tell you this: it always sounds like a good idea to come clean in front of the camera on a Sunday or Monday - when the taping of the live part of the show is still a few days away. This is the time when the producers maro the chabee and tell you to "rock it" and "tell the world what you're thinking". And you go ahead and say a bunch of things like: "Pritam is playing favorites", "He shouldn't be doing this" and "He doesn't love us as much as Debojit".

But when that little clip gets played on the show in a bhari mehfil, you suddenly realize what a bad idea that was. Its called Being Had By Producerji. Not that I'm complaining - its a nifty trick that is the life blood of any reality show worth its name.

In any case, this happened right after Debojit had finished singing. Pritam picked up the mike and ordered Debojit off the stage - specifically out of earshot. He asked the plaintiffs to get on the stage. "Edit all this out later" he muttered.

Then he launched into the story of a young boy who used to stutter all his life and how he thought he was no good. He wouldn't respond to questions he knew the answers to. But through love and encouragement from his parents and teachers, the boy became a success later in life.

"That boy is me!" finished Pritam displaying a fine propensity for drama. The Tare Zameen Par theme started playing in the background. (Boy is this the most "special" soundtrack of all time or what?)

Now this bit of drama would normally sound really cheesy. And not that it didn't - but coming from a supremely mellow cuddlebunny like Pritam it was downright touching. His fellow judges did wah-wah. The plaintiffs must have felt like heels because they fell on their feet and begged for forgiveness. No, seriously!

At this point all hell broke loose. If I remember correctly, Himesh and Shankar Mahadevan (who Himesh hilariously refers to as "The Nose of India") announced an alliance. Aadesh countered with a one-sided alliance with Pritam. Everyone got on stage and Yashita Yashpal, terribly charming purveyor of fine performances and wacky outfits, was used as the rope in a tug of war to decide if she was a boy or a girl. Please, don't ask!

Second thing of note happened when Abhishek Bachchan showed up on Sunday to promote his much maligned dud Drona. Faster than you could say "Slurp", the judges rushed to heap praise on him.

Now this I don't mind. After all, praising someone isn't a bad thing - it brings good cheer and encouragement all around. But calling Abhishek the "best hip hop singer in the country" is about where I'd draw the line.

That announcement was made by Pritam and even he didn't look entirely convincing while saying it. Abhishek preened. But because Himesh is the best at this particular activity (chatoing) he said something entirely nutty and entertaining.

"You are NUMBER ONE in everything!" Himanshu declared. "First of all, you are the NUMBER ONE Amitabh Bachchan's son" At this point I thought, if he says 'and you are the NUMBER ONE Aishwarya's husband' I'll become Himesh's slave for life. Unfortunately this did not happen but Himesh's declaration that Drona was a super-duper hit was still a lot of fun to listen to.

Abhishek then responded by announcing that he and Goldie Behl had started a Himesh Fan Club during the making of Drona. "On the Internet" he added. "And you weren't allowed to step on the set unless you didn't join the fan club". Himesh shifted in his seat with nervous delight - he wasn't quite sure if he was being had.

Luckily he didn't pick up the double negative Freudian slip in Abhishek's statement. Abhishek probably didn't either.

Now that is not what I don't call good entertainment.

Battles lines are drawn on Sa Re Ga Ma Pa Challenge 2009

2008-09-29T01:16:00.043-05:00

After a long time harnessing his somewhat quick temper, Himesh Reshammiya finally decided to unleash his inner Battle Droid - much as some of us had hoped for. He built some bridges, then burned them and then went ahead and half-heartedly tried to patch the charcoal. But I'm getting ahead of myself.

In the last few weeks - and I confess I have missed several episodes - fellow judge Shankar Mahadevan had effectively put Himesh in his place. This he did by not mincing his words whenever his opinion differed from Himesh. At the same time he back-slapped the other two judges - Pritam and Aadesh Srivastava - and cajoled them into providing somewhat veiled support.

Himesh, not doing himself any favors, gradually realized he was being pushed into one corner. And Mr. Roji Roti became Goody Two Shoes and the SRGMP show sputtered on in aman and shanti. Yes, that was me you heard snoring.

Thankfully the knife's edge was been restored on the show thanks to some rather silly disagreements - the best kind when it comes to judge jhagdas.

This week Himesh decided to announce that the judges would not dismiss a good singer over one bad performance . It might have helped to consult his fellow judges because as soon as he said that both Shankar and Aadesh jumped in to undermine him. Himesh, looking visibly troubled, trotted up on stage - perhaps not realizing that this grandstanding would piss people off even more. Finally to salvage it all, Himesh declared that Shankar and Aadesh were in one corner and Pritam and he were in another. Poor Pritam look a little shell-shocked if you ask me at this impromptu recruitement.

Later, Himesh announced his support for the girls on the show by stating that a girl should and will win SRGMP this year. But the taalis he was looking for instead came as a gaali. Somewhat inexplicably Aadesh referred to Himesh uncharitably as Chanakya. "I don't have any girls in my gharaana" he sniffed, implying that Himesh was shutting down Aadesh's house by throwing his lot in with the girls. Sa Re Ga Ma Kindergarten Pa.

On the second of the two shows this weekend, Imraan Khan and Minissha Lamba showed up to promote their new movie . The SRGMP producers manufactured a promo subplot of tremendously infectious silliness. This required Head to pretend that he had been kidnapped. Head freed himself and took the entire show to realize that Imraan had done it.

This brilliant bit of comedy showed that not satisfied with spanking the TRP covers of Voice of India and Indian Idol, SRGMP now had the kiddie shows squarely in its sights.

I enjoyed the presence of Imraan and Minissha quite a bit. Imraan seems to be of a new breed of actors - those who consciously try to act un-starry and strip any semblance of adaas from their body language. And Minissha - because she spoke articulately and didn't once try to "charm" us via unnecessary giggling - got major points from me.

All wasn't done yet. At one point Tarun Sagar delivered a rather lukewarm rendition of Gadar's mega hit Mein Nikla Gaddi Leke. Himesh immediately jumped to his defence by informing everyone that Tarun's throat was not in good shape. Yes, nodded Tarun sadly. Pritam issued an eye roll and warned Himesh not to play the galleries for sympathy. Himesh waved his middle finger around - supposedly unintentionally.

Aadesh, by now stewing over Himesh for some reason I can't explain, asked Tarun to prove it by singing the same song. Tarun croaked something out. "Beta" Aadesh shook his head "acting mat karo!" Tarun tried again - this time it sounded better. He got a hammering from both Aadesh and Himesh, who looked a little embarrassed.

But enough about the judges. Next week, I'll have to force myself to talk about the singing on the show.

Also:

Shubhchintak is happy
Bella is underwhelmed by Imraan but loved the tattoo
dockaul is looking for a name for Aadesh
Something is wrong with Minisha says j, who is enjoying Pritam, Shankar and Aadesh on the show
bee knows why Himesh is supporting the women now
Busy Bee shudders at the thought of a Drona related skit on the show
girlie girl can't believe Himesh was waving the middle finger around
j on Reva, Kaushik and Naina Saxena
m defends Shankar and bemoans the lack of a hottie on the show
Lin can't understand Asma's presence and the drama surrounding Sarah Raza
Something is wrong with how Asma's Hindi is wrong thinks m
Lin empathizes with m on the loss of a loved one on Junoon
Nepali Head identifies two more redos on Indian Idol

Sa Re Ga Ma Pa Challenge 2009: Song and Country

2008-08-18T09:00:00.007-05:00

Boy, there is nothing like a SRGMP August 15th episode to get everyone talking about Indo-Pak bhaicharaa. Thankfully this week we were spared clips from old movies of jawaans getting their limbs strewn all over the place - although I get the feeling that might yet happen later in the season.

After a tremendous national pride song and dance - in which one contestant had to suffer through pounding fake chillis on stage - Head trotted out and said something about how this Independence didn't feel right because we were a nation divided. A loose case was made for how SRGMP was blazing a trial no politician can. This was interspersed with a map of India, Pakistan and Bangladesh representing - and this is something people kept saying on the show - Akhand Bharat.

My respect for SRGMP shot up even more - if its possible. After all what show on this planet can make geo-political boundaries its bitch? In any case, Head dragged every Pakistani singer on stage and asked him that clunker of a question: how do you feel about being in India? Thankfully the Pakistani contingent is an articulate one and said wonderful and florid things.

Then it was the turn of Lahore's Sara Raza Khan - possessor of a dazzling smile, a woman-child voice and several redonkulosly cute performances. "I love Pakistan!" she said with enthusiasm, smiled at Head and compared India and Pakistan to two members of the family who didn't get along, went to live their separate ways, but still found time to meet and share the love. "This is a good arrangement" she said.

This seemed to wake up everyone on the show. SRGMP mein bagaawat! "I hate the word Partition!" Aadesh thundered. Anandji, guest mahaguru on the show and witness to azaadi, rebuked poor Sara for declaring her love for her country on stage. Sara gulped and nodded profusely. It was left to permanent mahaguru Kavita Krishnamurthy to save the day with some gracious comments. I know Partition is a touchy subject and a highly serious one, but because this was SRGMP, the whole thing left me very amused.

Yet, SRGMP has made invaluable contributions to South Asian togetherness. After all didn't we see how last year the show brought fans from across the border together worrying (about Mussarat Abbas's elimination), bickering (about Amanat Ali's loss in the finale) and agreeing (about Junaid Shaikh's hotness)?

And speaking of Kavita, can I suggest we replace Asha Bhonsle as mahaguru next year with Kavita? She handles those rowdy boys (also called judges) with detached aplomb, has a ready smile and a fair and even hand when deciding on singers. Besides she's got Mum's undying admiration. In fact, we should make her President of India. She could sing for all of us - something we don't get to hear often enough. Think about it: no more dozing off during Presidential addresses!

Moving on: the following day's episode was a Rakshabandhan special. Congratulations to the producers for dragging Ekta Kapoor along with brother Tusshar to the show. Ekta so looked like she didn't want to be there. How? For starters she wore an expression on her face that communicated boredom. She parked a honking purse on her lap and hid behind it. And you could see her tapping her feet with impatience on various occasions. This had the unfortunate effect of making the giant bag on her lap jiggle - allowing all of us to see how badly she wanted to get out of there.

But when some saas-bahu stuff came up, she perked up and said something dense that will make its way into a saas-bahu strategy book soon. She identified a Himesh song as her favorite, making the House of Reshammiya blush and break out into a terribly romantic song. She then commanded Shankar Mahadevan to sing. Soon enough, she high tailed it off the sets, leaving me hugely sad.

Happily, SRGMP in the US seems to have caught up with its Indian counterparts. In the interim episodes I must confess Pritam has become a personal favorite. His special episode was much fun to watch and that Pritam Puraan idea scaled the heights of tacky goodness. Who knew Pritam fainted at the sight of blood or that the cute insaan (Himesh's words not mine) once saved a caterpillar but threw his cell phone out of his window in the process, that he can't pour water into a glass (according to his lovely wife) and composed the Dhoom theme in a kitchen.

More Pritam on the show, I command you!

Also:

Ekta for president! says j
Tusshar seems to be a permanent house guest, says Over Rated
Ekta annoyed Mind Rush no end
j psychobabbles Ekta
leera reviews the August 15 and August 16 episodes
~mad munky~ has a scheme for paying off her wedding
Sara Fan hopes Sara's outspoken words don't result in vote loss
svr warms up to Sara and digs Kavita
Pitu is compelled to watch for Ekta Mata's sake
Megan rolls her eyes at the joke that rakhi has become and rants about her least favorite themes on SRGMP
What Sara has to do to fall from grace, according to j
Ekta on her purse and shoes
Deep goes JELR!
The Tusshar-Sara rakhee moment? Fake! says Anon
maxdavinci is bowled over by Sara
Bappi and Obhijit fight over Adnan Sami
Why was Sara dressed like an extra in Pakeeza? asks j

A thousand ways to suck on Sa Re Ga Ma Pa Challenge 2009

2008-08-06T02:04:00.004-05:00

Anyone who's watched that circus on crack, Sa Re Ga Ma Pa, will tell you that the singing can't be faked on this show.

Unlike other shows where you can jiggle your hips through a short song and tide over the occasional croak, on SRGMP your hips don't lie (that phrase a small tribute to Bappi, who I miss a lot this year). The focus is always on your pipes.

Small mistakes are caught, even the slightest lack of energy is noticed. The judges come ready to pick apart sur and taal. And there are no high energy performances you can hide behind.

But because the judges try hard to find the faults in every performance they sometimes come across as meanies - risking the ire of those high-strung SRGMP fans. As a result, the judges have devised some wonderful ways of telling the contestants if they suck.

Here is a guide to what the judges say (and what they really mean) on SRGMP.

You started really well!
(But it was all downhill from there)

We have a lot of expectations from you!
(And you hardly lived up to them today)

You sang better than last time!
(You blew then, you merely sucked today)

The standard of this show has gone up lately!
(And guess who's not up to it baby)

You must sing better next time!
(Good luck with having a next time)

Your performance was kamaal!
(Wish your singing was as kamaal as your performance)

You must do more riyaaz!
(You aren't going to make the cut, thanks for coming)

You have a very good voice!
(But your singing, well, that's a different story)

You were out of tune!
(Pack up your bags already)

Also:

~mad munky~ likes "you have a unique voice"
maxdavinci adds "tonal quality" and "aaj ki awaaz"
squarecut.atul envisions the legends of the past on SRGMP
girlie girl enjoys the drama on SRGMP
anu g wishes the US catches up with India
Tania adds "you are well suited for another jonar"
j tries to make sense of the ZeeTV marathon
The judges ticks' during the singing amuses Kanan
How about those excuses contestants make? asks Mind Rush
svr has one on the on-demand singing
The behen ki shaadi guy is an established Jagrata singer announces Anon

Sa Re Ga Ma Pa Challenge 2009: Better late than never

2008-08-05T03:11:00.015-05:00

Man, it sure sucks that SRGMP in the US is running behind India by several weeks. But this also makes me feel less guilty about making fun of their biggest show week after week. Its payback for cocking this season up so badly.

I ended up watching the first show (some seven weeks later) this Saturday. What happened? Plenty to bamboozle us all.

First Head showed up trying to look all gangster-like only he looked like the Indian version of L'il Bow Wow. He got into a motorcycle-escorted white limo which was inexplicably driven over some ubad-khabad kachcha rasta. This must have shaken up Head because when he came out of it, he jumped on stage and kept bouncing around.

As if to focus attention on his well, head, Head had slicked his hair into my younger son's favorite hairstyle - affectionately called The Rhino around the house. This bit of deft identification with the masses made me sit up and take note that a smarter, friendlier season of SRGMP was at hand.

Later Head said some long winded nonsense by way of introduction and announced that there would be Indian, Pakistani, Bangladeshi and videshi singers on the show. This startling bit of news made me switch to BBC briefly to check if India had indeed annexed its two neighbors. After making sure that they hadn't, I marveled at this wonderful bit of South Asia against the World bit of bhaichara and meri aankhein nam hui.

Barely had this excitement subsided that Himesh was introduced with much fanfare which in the House of Reshammiya these days means: Wind-blown Hair and Explosions! Luckily mahaguru Asha Bhonsle wasn't around to witness all this manliness.

Himesh along with that Lego head of hair has developed a fascinating walk - he swivels his shoulders with every step. This catwalk strut - which would shame the likes of Heidi Klum - was Himesh's way of telling us that as far as adaa was concerned, SRGMP would go for broke this season.

All of this was extremely appetite-whetting. And Shankar Mahadevan hadn't even fallen out of the sky yet. But he promptly did and executed a smart walk joined by his chelas - a sharp looking bunch of boys and girls who turned out to be the weakest bunch of singers. But I'm getting ahead of myself.

Shankar got on stage and immediately announced that he wasn't that kind of a person. Here he squinted at Himesh and shook his head ruefully - meaning he wasn't a dramebaaz like nudge, nudge, you know who. Himesh barely blinked, snapped up the mike and said something that I didn't fully understand but which sounded dramatic.

Here I will take the liberty of ignoring judge Aadesh Srivastava's entry - blandness ki liye there is no place on the Drift.

We all met the final judge Pritam as he emerged from under the waves of a roiling sea - all soaked and delirous. This was SRGMP's way of tweaking social Bollywood stereotypes in which actresses are subjected to this kind of treatment. Pritam jumped up, sloshed his wet hair around and aligned himself with his chelas. Then the whole sea behind him exploded in a ball of fire.

After his snaan, Pritam walked on stage and issued a mild challenge to Himesh in the Chatoo Sweepstakes. But Himesh defused this by calling Pritam a cute insaan. You could sense the love between these two. Pritam later happily settled down and turned out to be the most focussed judge among all.

On to the singers! Lest you think that SRGMP is all judge drama, a number of promising singers came out and tested their pipes. I look forward to listening to their talent in the weeks to come.

Also:

How about the Khiladi Kapoor and Salman Khan shows asks yajnaseni
j narrates the emergence of the hero and villain on the show
girlie girl loves the tension between Ashaji and Himesh
Khiladi Kapoor show - waste of time according to maxdavinci
svr discovers the connection between SRGMP and Kekta soaps
j is tired of gareeb bhai naataks and Pakistan tourist questions
Pitu is tempted to start watching
Are the four gurus representing the earth, fire, air and water? wonders Mind Rush
Mind Rush has ideas for the producers

Reality shows I'd like to see

2008-07-30T05:10:00.002-05:00

Finally with the welcome demise of SRGMP Challenge USA, we can go back to watching the best show on Indian TV - SRGMP Challenge 2009.

But between SRGMP last year and now what have we seen? Tired shows with familiar contestants. Jaded, uninventive finales. Unconvincing jhagdas. Is this what the world of TV is coming to?

Fortunately I'm enough of an achha insaan to part with some high concepts for TV shows I've been working on lately. Note: I've used popular songs as show names to provide instant brand recognition. Pretty clever, haa?

Show: I am a Disco Dancer
The Pitch: Contestants dress and sing like Bappi and get graded by how well they can fool Bappi's son Bappa. Final three have to dress, sing and cook something that Bappi would like. The best part of this show is that anyone can participate and try to look or sing like Bappi, regardless of gender or age.
Judges: Abhijit, Bappa Lahiri

Show: Dum Maaro Dum
The Pitch: A cash-in on the new fitness craze in India, singers sing while exercising. The best songercise gets the highest points. A calorie counter is employed and combined with the judges scores.
Judges: Adnan Sami, Himesh Reshammiya

Show: Geet gaata chal
The Pitch: Dum Maaro Dum but for seniors
Judges: Vyjantimala Bali, Dev Anand

Show: Roop tera mastaana
The Pitch: An entire team (lyricist-composer-singer) gets together each week and composes something in praise of Himesh Reshammiya. The one who does the best job gets the highest points. Final three get to perform with the man himself.Winner gets to spend a day in the House of Reshammiya. Loser gets to spend two days.
Judges: Ismail Darbar, Hansika Motwani

Show: Mummy ko nah hai pataa
The Pitch: Party Central for girls! Each week contestants do something outrageous that would kill their parents if they found out and then air it on TV. Parents are invited and their reactions are aired during and right after the "performance".
Judges: Malaika Arora, Sonam, Upen Patel, Babita

Show: Laila mai Laila
The Pitch: Bollywood starlets perform based on a theme each week. Suggested artists: Udita Goswami, Kim Sharma, Amrita Arora, Shamita Shetty, Celina Jaitley and Tanushree Dutta (pretty much any woman from this awesome video). Suggested themes: suhaag raat ki laila, sadaa suhaagan laila, Bappi nite laila, Barish mein laila, Ranjit ki laila.
Judges: Feroz Khan, Bindu, Shakti Kapoor

Show: Mehngai maar gai
The Pitch: A-list politicians are given Rs 500 to take their family out for the evening and have a good time. Strolls in parks or Chowpatty are not permitted. Each week viewers get to watch one contestant discover the real India.
Judges: Shatrughan Sinha, Jaya Bachchan

Show: Tashan Mein
The Pitch: Karan Johar and Manish Malhotra get together each week and pick a tashan-challenged celebrity to adopt and beautify. The season will open with Sameera Reddy and the finale will feature Parmeshwar Godrej.
Judges: Gauri Khan, Tusshar Kapoor

j is reminded of a game
meena votes for Mehngai Maar Gai with Amar Singh
Pitu votes for the Bappi show
As does Bella
Reality TV needs Himanshu realizes girlie girl
Bitterlemons votes for Mehgai and Tashan Mein
Mehngai Maar Gai reminds Kanan of a scene from Mr. India
girlie girl doesn't think much of McCain's lack of Internet savvy
This Internet issues strengthens McCain's old fogey impression says Pitu
j has a point about youth, age, inexperience and ability
Chicago + desis = Obama says girle girl
meena links to a McCain article
McCain doesn't do many campus' notes girlie girl
Pitu reveals her tea brand
This Internet thing is blown up because of McCain's age thinks j
http://www.aspisdrift.com/2008/07/reality-shows-id-like-to-see.html#comment-7303402780539092349
Kanan reveals her tea of choice
The right way to make tea, by girlie girl
Mummy ko nahi hai pata evokes mixed reactions in Pappu
svr votes for Dum Maaro Dum
j rolls her eyes at most Indian restaurants in the US
And how about that snooze-worthy sitar music, says meena
Never Mind!!'s tea choices
Two brothers, one in a fountain, Anon narrates an incident
girlie girl has another jaanwar bachcha incident to narrate

Will clap for food

2008-03-06T06:08:00.001-06:00

Hey remember that girl who got up on Sa Re Ga Ma Pa once, kissed Head and proposed to him much to his "suprise"? (That's right, the very same one who said "I want to propose you" at which point I would have said "I want to run away you")

That cost the SRGMP producers about Rs 1,000 to stage. Cost to the girl: beating from Mum and a broken engagement.

This and more about the life of an extra who makes a living as a TV audience in this fascinating piece by Rama Lakshmi which the Drift Memsaab stumbled upon in the Chicago Tribune (first published in the Washington Post).

A few more fun highlights from the article, which also provides some terrific insights into the staging of reality TV:

Audiences make about Rs 200 per show and pull in around Rs 6,000 monthly. Meals, snacks and tea are included

Indian clothes are not allowed on the show. Girls have to wear jeans and shirts

Sometimes instead of cheering, the producers ask the audience to sway silently with the music during several hours of "retakes"

The most empowering moment for the audience on SRGMP? Punching the button to vote for the show's best singer. "I am deciding somebody's future"

Also:

How come girls make more than boys here? asks sidekick

SkD is majorly put off

Joules is hardly surprised

Trudging up fake enthusiasm is depressing says headmistress

anu g analyses a potentially staged incident on Chote Ustaad

girlie girl feels sorry for Head Kiss Girl

There are two professions where women outearn men says Mind Rush

Are the phoren audience members also paid? wonders HoonPanGujarati

Probably so, says Joules, after they are hunted down from Cafes

At least those school kids are having fun says Cinderella

Life after Sa Re Ga Ma Pa

2008-01-09T06:25:00.000-06:00

Here I was just before the turn of the New Year, sitting in an empty CC Mehta Hall in Vadodara. I was playing escort to my son Motorsandal who was rehearsing his guitar backdrop for a skit in Mum's Annual Day. And as part of the other rehearsals, this really familiar looking guy with a winning personality jumps on stage and belts out a few songs - including an excellent version of "Chappa Chappa Charkhha Chale". His smile and that hair style with the rhino like protrusion on top looked really familiar so I asked Mum who he was.

Why that's Yogi, she said. He used to be on Sa Re Ga Ma Pa with your favorite, Himesh. Ah yes, things fell into place: Yogi Pathak from London of the Rock gharana! The guy who Himesh once hailed as a "bahut achha insaan" right before he was given the kiss-off on the show.

After the annual day show, I knocked down several enthusiastic parents crowding to congratulate Mum and gave chase to Yogi, catching him just as he was about to mount his motorcycle. Yogi flashed me that big smile when I made introductions and so friendly was he that it felt I'd known him for a long time.

Tremendous insights about the competition and his mentor Himanshu emerged during the conversation, which unfortunately I cannot print because the entire thing was off the record. Lets just say, Yogi described it as a terrific crucible for learning about the mechanics and politics of music.

At one point I asked Yogi why he'd moved to Vadodara from London. Another big smile. "I've always been in Vadodara" he said. Apparently Yogi was on a 6-month work permit in London when he auditioned for SRGMP, which resulted in him "representing" the UK. Hmmm...

Besides grinding out the local music scene he is also getting additional taleem under Dwarkanath Bhonsle in Vadodara. After exchanging mobile numbers I called him a few days later and tried to get Yogi to come down and talk to me on record but he was busy commuting and doing shows in Nadiad through New Years.

Next time then, Yogi!

Also:

anu g links to the post-show dramas with Toshi (VoI) and Rakhi (Nach Baliye)

Himesh Reshammiya versus Rakhi Sawant

2007-10-29T10:36:00.001-05:00

Having seen Himesh all summer on Sa Re Ga Ma Pa, I recently stumbled across Rakhi Sawant on Nach Baliye 3. It's hard to ignore either one and they carry the same cheesy entertainment quotient. So I thought I'd see how they stacked up against each other.

Fake drama: Rakhi recently engineered a confounding message from her Mom on Nach Baliye with an out of the blue appeal to leave no girl behind just because of her gender. Deliciously loopy! Himesh, as is well documented, converted a 17-year-old into a reluctant lover boy and annoyed the bejeesus out of his fellow judges on SRGMP.
Winner: Tie

Positive Energy: Both vie for the Farah Khan donated title "Number One Positive Energy". Either could find something cool to say about a rusted bed of nails. But when Himesh chatos, he weaves in inflated details from the slathered hasti's past thus convincing them momentarily that their past three disasters have actually been monster hits.
Winner: Himesh

Looks: I went back and looked at Rakhi's old videos - she ain't bad looking. On the other hand, Himesh looks like the kid every aspiring bully would want to start their middle-school bullying career with.
Winner: Rakhi

Cleavage: Sure Rakhi has the big now-small again drama going on with hers, but laughing about it just makes me feel like a creep. On the other hand, Himesh's expansive man-cleavage makes me feel like worse things could have happened than losing my hair.
Winner: Himesh for helping my self-esteem

Acting aspirations: Rakhi has some comic timing and can go from sobbing to perky in under 3 nanoseconds, thus enabling a director to save on elaborate scene transitions. As far as acting goes Himesh is comic, can move around a bit and deliver dialogue in a flat monotone making him a lock-in for Cyborg-type roles when the sci-fi genre takes off in Bollywood.
Winner: Tie

Himesh wins the toe-to-toe 2-1.

More in this series: Shahrukh Khan versus Amitabh

Also:

Joules feels bad for Rakhi and announces a new Himesh movie

Megan thinks Rakhi hasn't done too shabbily for herself

Leera calls both the beacons of our own burgeoning brand of saas-bahu reality tv

musing thinks I've got it all wrong. Rakhi is the greatest.

Sidekick lays down her thoughts on Rakhi, Himesh and intentional malice

anu g imagines a Rakhi reaction to this post and informs us Ashaji is pissed at Himesh again

Amrita plans a morcha to convince us Rakhi can't lose this fight and links to Supergirl Rakhi

Sania loves what Rakhi has accomplished in Bollywood and, against all odds, is touched by her girl power crusade

meena can't help but cheer Rakhi on

SkD loves Rakhi, hates Himesh

Mind Rush joins Meena in a cheer for Rakhi

As does minnie

Priti picks the lesser of two evils

The head that grew up

2007-10-16T12:00:00.000-05:00

Early on SRGMP when we saw Aditya Narayan he looked poky and nervous. He issued verbal jabs more than he hosted - it sounded like he was reciting carefully rehearsed lines and then getting the hell off camera. Instead of owning his show, he let it take him by the scruff of the neck.

And I've made fun of him all season, which leads me to say a few nice things about him now that the show is over.

On the show itself, his passive hosting allowed the gurus and contestants to take center stage. Yes, he was wooden (hey that acting career might be a problem, son) and asked the same darn question of everyone over and over again but he did a mean dance and he didn't sing bad either.

More importantly, he had an amiable presence - smiling his way through almost everything and leading several of those terrific, uncoordinated opening dances. Often guests on the show would strike up a banter with him - highlighting him in ways no host could hope for.

For all his timidness, Head came into his own when it mattered the most - in the Grand Finale.

Hosting a huge, long, live show with panache, he kept a good leash on it - often filling in blank spaces by moving things along. He had time to engineer a touching father-son moment and cranked out a couple of mimed song and dances.

In a fine homage to SRGMP's cheesiness, he pretended to play the piano and left in mid-key to grab a couple of backup dancers' baahein.

When Himesh was basking in Aneek's win by issuing another long bhaashan, Head deftly put the spotlight on the guy who finished second - Raja Hasan. And very pointedly touted him as the perennial favorite. Later he veritably cut off Himesh when he had outstayed his welcome - talking over him and leaving the winning guru blurting life lessons into a dead mike.

Good work Head! Show Grade: B. Finale Grade: A

Also:

anu g's family raves about Aditya

Manish thinks Head asserted himself because Himesh was history on SRGMP

Musing has a dystopian vision of Head on SRGMP 2009

girlie girl and Megan point out a few amusing things about Head

Sidekick congratulates Head and points us to this brewing controversy on SRGMP

qwitiqqx thinks Head has a terrible stylist but believes the head bobbing has improved

Sania points us to this vid of Head giving us a tour of his house

Which amuses Megan enough to elicit this commentary

Head's fake angrezi accent cracks up Mind Rush

And girlie girl

OzAngel reports on the new Macbeth and links to this piece on the climb to fame for SRGMP alums

sexy Aditya reveals his plans

Saritha says Head suffers from the Kareena syndrome

Megan dives into the world of comic book geeks

SRGMP Gurus: The Winners

2007-10-15T09:08:00.000-05:00

Drift Regular Priti writes this SRGMP epilogue to give a special trophy to the winning mentors.

SRGMP went from “strength to strength” through the season but culminated in the biggest let down with the Grand Finale. In a way this was helpful, because I'm not sure if I’ll miss the show now. So badly was the final episode conceptualized and executed that it left me with a bad taste in the mouth.

Now that SRGMP has declared the winner, who really were the winning mentor(s)? Lets rewind to the journey of the gurus.

Guru Him-mess B

At times bitchy, sometimes spewing venom, often ungracious, occasionally spiteful, almost always arrogant...gosh – the list seems endless!

I kept looking for guru-like qualities like uniting disciples or leading from the front. Sure he led sometimes – like in making Raja feel ashamed people had voted him in, when Mussarat was edged out. Setting up Raja with the "Bade Bhaiya must win" angle. In an NDTV interview, Vishal and Shekhar said that HR is a marketing genie-ass. On SRGMP he showed us why. He knew the pulse of the junta.

Guru ISmileNot Darbar

Darbar chewed something almost constantly on the show but he sucked up to HR shamelessly, sometimes even looking for cues at HR. He made the right noises, but finally bared his fangs when Amanat ended up at the bottom.

After the show, he said in an interview to Zee that Amanat should have won: “jisne bhi yeh SMS ka system banaya hai, bilkul bakwas hai! Third class hai!

Darbar Sa’ab I should remind you of your earlier declarations: “junta jo bhi karegi, bilkul soch samajh kar karegi”, and “janta ka faisla sar aankhon par”?

Vishal and Shekhar

V-S encouraged all the participants, stayed calm and composed even when gurus lashed out at their protégé. They gave sensible advise to all, gave standing ovations to great performances, judged even their chelas fairly and stayed away from the nautanki HR had created. In a foregone conclusion, the winners for the best guru trophy are V-S.

V-S, you’ll be missed sorely for your sense and sensibility. Just as we'll miss Him-mess, but only because he gave us so much to vent at.

Also:

Dev finds out that Darbar is crying foul and points us to this piece on Aneek wins, Himesh loses

Shekhar ki Deewani teaches SRGMP: The Marketing Class, has a really bad dream and compares Himesh and Mika

OzAngel thinks Mika is better than Himesh

Sidekick has a special, very fond award for Bappida

anu g notes that Aneek dropped an F-bomb when he won

Megan is confounded by the feet-touching drama engineered by Himesh and Head's rendition of "This Love"

Megan and SkD respond with some V-S love

Musing has a rather funny vision of SRGMP 2009

Joules is tired of the uncles and auntys that show up in the shows

Killer points us to rajahasan.com's take on the show

Anon points out that Darbar might cry foul now but he might have rigged things earlier on too

dockaul reproduces this behind the scenes scoop after the Grand Finale

Sa Re Ga Ma Pa 2007 Grand Finale: The last laugh is barely a chuckle

2007-10-14T20:50:00.000-05:00

Its almost given that a show that spun itself to such heights is eventually going to get it wrong. Yet early on in Saturday's Grand Finale, SRGMP showed a tiled image of "great" moments and at its very center it put Akshay in a toothy smile wielding a nanchaku. Wow, I thought to myself - these guys really understand their cheesy appeal, this is going to be a great show!

But SRGMP - by trying to ape a sorry Indian Idol finale - stumbled badly in very basic ways.

These aren't nitpicks: on a show that showcases singing, miming is unacceptable. And apart from Vishal Shekhar, Mussarat and Himesh Reshammiya - every performance was mimed. More importantly it was mimed badly.

This sucked a lot of energy out of the show - rendering the return of all 11 finalists to a mere side show. Not to mention it was embarrassing to watch the audience going wah-wah to the fake singing.

More energy left when the guru interactions were taken out of the equation because lets face it - they provided most of the entertainment on the show with their alpha male "my contestant is bigger than yours" posturing.

None of this stopped Himesh from asserting himself all over the show. Appearing in a cleavage to rival the Grand Canyon, at one point he summoned all the little kids in the arena to cock a snook at security, "break the rules" and rush on to the stage. What a role model Himanshu is turning out to be!

Now I noticed several muchhad types on the stage trying to pass themselves as little kids. This was a genuinely hilarious moment - several guards had to strong arm people off the stage. (Note to fans: take it from someone who's tried it before. When crashing a stage, pretend to be security - bellow orders to the nearest person and you'll make it all the way through)

Although Raja Hasan finally embraced his resemblance to Mithun by singing the greatest song in the history of Indian cinema - Gunmaster G-9 - it was Amanat's presence that I enjoyed the most. Isn't there anything this guy looks bad in? Carrying deliriously tacky outfits with panache, he made the right moves and said the right thing. His gifting of his watch to Ismail Darbar at the end was the show's most touching moment for me.

All told, was Aneek's win a surprise? It would have been if not for yesterday's pre-show in which the leads were announced by Head. But it really shouldn't matter because this contest isn't about who the best singer is anyway - not for me. Its about non-stop tacky entertainment.

After the show, Meena called to say that Himesh has 200-300 hits, a super-hit movie and now this come from behind win for his chela, which will make him insufferable going forward.

Yes, and I look forward to that!

Worth a look: Chicago Tribune story on SRGMP ahead of the finals

Also:

Shekhar ki Deewani and Sanjay live blog the Finale telecast

Priti is hugely disappointed by the last show

Sidekick believes a huge live show for the finale was a mistake and mentions how Himesh held everyone fascinated with disgust

Megan has the worst day of her month

anu g is happy for Poonam

Musing envisions the new Himesh

Payal outlines the fracas during the winning announcement

amanat_fan is disappointed that music took a back seat to tamasha

Anon believes the show is stacked against minorities

anu g offers a counter-argument, an interesting take on the winner from Anand Raj Anand and asks "how many of us actually voted?!"

Sidekick's take on SMS voting

Joules is miffed by the bath robe inspired designs in the finale

Rupal wonders about Himesh's pichhla chela Vineet from 2005, hopes Himesh remains a one-hit-movie wonder and wants the KAALI DAAL KA KISSA investigated

Saritha digs into Himesh's victory

Sanjay waxes philosophical about victory and defeat

Anon is traumatized by Himesh's man boobs

Megan thinks they are weapons of mass trauma

qwitiqqx was twice pissed off at the finale

minnie rues the missed opportunities for Poonam

girlie girl believes Amanat was the improved singer who showed the most improvement

Sa Re Ga Ma Pa is still a three horse race

2007-10-13T07:00:00.000-05:00

What was the best part of the wrap-up, warm-up SRGMP show this Friday? Watching Bappida again. Ok, so it was only a jhalak, but with all the bleeng bleeng on him its hard to miss even a nanosecond of the man.

Thankfully keeping the mandatory mass hysteria shots to a minimum, SRGMP avoided the pitfalls that besieged Indian Idol 3 in its final weeks. (If the singers are really popular, you don't have to ram it down everyone's throats.)

I enjoyed watching some of the best performances from the top 3, although I would have liked to have seen more of the people we haven't seen in a while - the ones kicked off the show in weeks past.

Fans of Raja Hasan have reason to rejoice. His lead in India remains kayam. However, international voting makes this a highly unpredictable exercise. So while votes from India put Raja on top, followed by Aneek and then Amanat, the tally outside India was the reverse of this order.

The winner in all of this: Aneek who ended up on top, followed by Raja and then Amanat.

This makes it a three-horse race although Raja still remains the favorite. Amanat is now, unofficially, the dark horse.

Also:

anu g links us to who is appearing in the finale and who's singing what

Payal can't wait to see the previous contestants on the show

Megan can't wait to see Harpreet again

Musing delves into why SRGMP was so successful and gives us TRP estimates

Mind Rush goes gift-giving

2007-10-10T16:36:00.000-05:00

Dear SRGMP producers,

We have come a long way, baby!

You entertained us along the journey, and we loved the ride. Now that it is almost time to say alvidaa! I adore all the 3 contestants and they have my best wishes for hugely successful careers.

But what about our judges? Don’t they deserve a bit more than the traditional bouquet of flowers you might be giving them? Here are some farewell gifts that I would give the judges:

To Shekhar, I would give the 2007 Edition of the Webster’s Thesaurus. Please look up synonyms; the adjective “Mind-blowing” should be retired

To Vishal, I would give a year’s membership to the gym. Enough said...

To Bappida, I would give special access to the US Reserve Bank’s 16 room uber-secure vault. Hopefully the bleeng bleeng will fit in it

To Ismail Darbar, I would give a silver spoon, to enable his chamchaagiri

Finally, to Him-Mess Besharmiya I would give a butcher’s knife to chop off his you-know-what…
(actually, I’m referring to his ego. What did you think???)

Sincerely,
Mind Rush

Also:

girlie girl wants to give Shekhar a copy of "Grammar for Dummies"

Deepu wants to give Himesh a huge care package

Megan would like to give herself in a box of whipped cream to Shekhar and has a Himesh Halloween costume idea

Mind Rush returns to tell us Farah's spats with Anu on II2 might have cost him OSO

Priti wants to give Himesh a one-way zipper for his mouth and cleavage and Darbar a complimentary spa pass

Shekhar Ki Deewani would like to give "Shekoo" whatever he wants, Vishal herself as a gym partner, Darbar a 100% discount coupon for the Home Store but wants Bappida's bleeng

Kanan wants to give coupons for the best hair salon in Mumbai to all of them so they can get haircuts, except Vishal who can get a head massage instead

Megan and Shekhar ki Deewani meet

Bella digs up a wardrobe count of Himesh's caps and jackets

Dance Party on Sa Re Ga Ma Pa Challenge 2007

2007-10-08T09:36:00.000-05:00

I must confess Sanjay Gupta's shilling for his anthology flick Dus Kahaniy a on SRGMP this week did leave my curiosity duly tickled. Ten flicks, roughly ten minutes each, filled with starlets and aspiring wannabes and some item numbers to boot. The last time one of my favorite directors - Allison Anders - tried this on a smaller scale in Four Rooms along with her buddies Tarantino and Rodriquez, it fell flat on its face. So this looks intriguing!

It was a stroke of genius on the part of the SRGMP producers to invite Gupta and his considerable entourage on the show. Because I went crazy ass bananas trying to take in the reactions of everyone - not to mention poking fun at some of them kept me thoroughly busy and entertained.

At one point, I remember Mika Singh jumped on stage and did a helicopter with his hair. This made my head spin. And no one had even said Mindblowing yet, so I was pretty sober. I also noted that Neha Dhupia was completely outdanced by the girl on her left. Poor Mika looked pretty insecure every time one of the three finalists turned in yet another rousing performance. Diya Mirza, with her left arm in a cast, did a chest thump to applaud Amanat. Himesh Reshammiya was forced to dance and gave us a glimpse of his Amitabh-level competence. And Baby Bleeng Bleeng appeared to have consumed way too much coffee in the pre-show reception.

But what I enjoyed the most was when everyone found themselves on stage and very gamely tried to shake a leg - often looking severely comical - not that they seemed to mind. Manoj Bajpai jumping on stage to issue a horrific, but rather sporting, dance with Raja Hasan led to the first impromptu Jhalak Dikhlaa Jaa audition.

Then when Aneek sang, Himesh tried to engineer yet another romanchuk moment for his chela. First, he had poor Diya Mirza trot on stage and surprise Aneek. Aneek looked as surprised as my toothbrush is to see me in the morning. Somehow Himesh managed to convince all the girls to go on stage and say cute things to Aneek. To his credit, Aneek didn't bat an eyelid and lapped it all up.

Now this made me cringe, but what I did have fun with was the pressure this put on Ismail Darbar to bring some glitter to his chela's subsequent performance. Thus when Amanat sang, Darbar grabbed as many of the stars he could lay his hands on and pushed them on stage to clap and dance with Amanat. And here's the rub: surely this doesn't help the votes. So this sideshow is now entirely a platform for the gurus to outdo each other. Later Darbar - who looked somewhat depressed throughout the show - paid kudos to Amanat mentioning that his performance had drawn so many hastis on stage. Gee, Darbar, next time try not to drag everyone up there and then we'll see.

So who has the momentum now on SRGMP? Raja gathered more moss on this show than either Aneek or Amanat. Aneek was rock steady again and to his credit, Himesh is still trying hard to manufacture a come-from-behind win for his entry. But Amanat dispelled many doubts over his presence on the show - especially mine - with his fearless singing.

Also:

Sania wonders about Mika

anu g and anon sing Amanat's praises

Priti describes the on-stage tamasha

qwitiqqx believes Himesh has a limited vocabulary

sidekick's theory is that Mika's tacky intrusion actually helped Amanat and ToI is on Himesh's payroll

Joules points us to Mika's claim to fame and declares this the worst episode of SRGMP ever

Saritha clarifies the difference between Rohit Roy and Ronit Roy. Hint: its not one letter

girlie girl's new favorite is Amanat

Kanan is on the same page vis-a-vis Amanat and points us to this picture of the Roy brothers at Ronit's wedding

anu g reports a recent sighting of Bappida on Bathroom Singer

bird's eye view has given up on Aneek because of his guru's antics

Sa Re Ga Ma Pa Challenge 2007: A competition of gurus

2007-10-06T11:00:00.000-05:00

When Adnan Sami showed up on SRGMP, I was reminded of a supremely bitchy moment on the show some episodes ago engineering by none other than Ismail Darbar - that earthy saint of moohphat reactions. Raja Hasan had just sung one of Sami's songs and Darbar promptly ordered him to sing a line again - this time with ladoos in his mouth: a none too veiled reference to Sami's yodelly turns of phrase.

On the show, however, Darbar behaved himself for the most part. Once, he delivered a betrayal of some intensity by dressing down his chela Amanat for going through the motions on "Saawariya" - fast turning into the most annoying hit song of the year for me.

Later, feeling tremendously guilty, he heaped some irrelevant praise on Amanat. Yet, Amanat had the last laugh. With international voting behind him, he pipped Aneek to the post, sent Himesh into gloom and surprised everyone.

Early on, it was fun to watch Adnan Sami's jaw progressively drop as each of the three finalists delivered terrific performances. You could see him thinking "Geez, how did I ever get on that other show with the crap singers."

Later, Himesh decided to take the battle to Vishal Shekhar with a frivolous khot-finding session of Raja's fine singing of Kailash Kher's "Saiyaan".

This prompted Vishal and Shekhar - missing from the show for the first two rounds of singing - to promptly pack up their studio session and hurry on stage to support their contestant. Here, Shekhar shrewdly first raised an eyebrow at the daat from Himesh and Darbar and then before either could open his mouth heaped copious praise on both. Vishal could learn a lesson or two on how to play the judges from this man.

However, Himesh's tip of the his topi to the live musicians touched me. I had much good fun watching them - in fact, I don't believe I've ever seen anyone in a suit playing tabla. Another first for SRGMP!

Clearly Raja is resurgent on the show. He is very much a singer of confidence - which has been restored now. Aneek still is singing beautifully and seems to really enjoy extra pressure as is evident whenever the entire party joins him on stage for a song.

The lack of power in Amanat's voice is, however, painfully evident now. He's a terrific singer but he struggled on the first of this weekend's two episodes. I'll be a little surprised if he holds on to his number 2 spot over the finals - and music directors will likely have to wait for the right song before inviting him to sing it. However, his presence is still a winning one and if he picks the right songs - all could be well with him.

Also:

Manish believes Amanat's dressing down was a staged nautanki and would like to offer Himesh a razor and a chapstick

dev would prefer to offer him a laxative instead

Dave points out that Raja's new look makes him look like a masjid-bunder

0.02Worth has a plot idea for SRGMP

sidekick's deep thoughts on the episode and an excellent analysis on sur versus power

Priti's round by round report

Ritha digs up this inside story on the on-screen transformation of the contestants and points out that Shekhar is a lover of double superlatives

anu g is tickled by the Himesh Look of Intensity when Aneek is singing

amanat_fan offers proof of the quiet power in Amanat's voice

Kanan digs Adnan Sami's new look and wants Darbar to fire his darji

The man behind the Shaker

2007-10-06T10:09:00.000-05:00

Mind Rush puts the psychoanalytic spotlight on Shekhar

SRGMP has unleashed many a musician’s prowess. For me, the show unleashed my inner psychoanalyst. Shekhar’s dancing on stage on Oct 5 revealed deep secrets to his personality. I share these with you from my couch as circles of smoke emanate from my cigar:

Analyst’s Report

Patient’s name: Shekhar R (last name withheld to maintain confidentiality)
Age: thirty-something
Profession: Musician
Venue: A music show in a large city in India (Details withheld to maintain confidentiality)

Date: Oct 5, 2007

Patient’s Action: Eagerly jumping up on stage to dance
My Analysis: Passionate, exuberant, impulsive man

Patient’s Action: Standing behind the singers or to the side while on stage
My Analysis: Does not need to hog limelight (Are ya listening, HR?). Also, thoughtful, observant.

Patient’s Action: Keeping hands in his pocket while dancing
My Analysis: The man keeps secrets. No matter how well you get to know him, it’s hard to ferret out all his true feelings. He is an introvert.

Patient’s Action: Dancing on stage for all 3 contestants
My Analysis: A true lover of music! Ingrained sense of fairness and decency. (Are ya listening, HR?)

Patient’s Action: Bindaas dancing on stage even though dancing skills are modest
My Analysis: Music helps him overcome his inherent shyness. Does not obsess over his image. (Are ya listening, HR?)

Phaltu Drift Advice to Patient: Please enroll for next season’s Jhalak Diklaa Jaa.

Meanwhile, I will turn my psychoanalysis spotlight onto another judge’s actions and behavior. Are ya listening, HR?

Much ado about hand holding

2007-10-03T10:00:00.000-05:00

Mind Rush puts tongue in cheek and analyzes Shekhar's recent Deepika hand-grab.

Much ado was created by the last episode on SRGMP where we see Shekhar holding hands with Deepika. This incident begs a series of questions…

Can a man hold hands with a woman in public if she is not his wife, girlfriend, mother or daughter? In India? In Mumbai? If she’s labeled a PYT? And if he’s older than her, married, and she’s supposedly single? Is this duo guilty of breaking some major code of behavior? Or are they innocent?

Let’s explore the many facets of this issue before we answer...

First the setting. This happened on stage, not in a darkened pub. It happened when music was pulsating, V-S were on a high as they promoted their music on “their” show and a good time was being had by all. Initial evidence suggests: Innocent.

Next, let’s look at the act itself. Yes, hand-holding can be intimate. Or a gesture to steady someone’s nerves. (Exhibit A: All lawyers seem to hold hands with their opposite gender clients on the steps of the courthouse.) Hand holding can be a prelude to dancing. All of the above are socially acceptable. Jury is tending towards: Innocent.

Now let’s examine context. Hmmm. Older desi man, younger, pretty actress. In many, many parts of Bharat, this is a no go. So many people see hand holding as just a tiny step below public smooching. And see where that got Shilpa Shetty (and Gere). Anyway, what I am saying is that in the entertainment world public perception is reality. Jury is confused: Guilty??

Do explore alternate explanations. Are S and D related? Who knows? Did she want to grab his hand becoz she just felt comfortable? Quite possible. Was Shekhar about to faint again due to low blood sugar and he needed the extra support? (Bring in a new witness, the show ka doctor) Jury is thinking hard. Not sure. Maybe. Perhaps.

Finally, let’s examine motive. And I mean our own. Why the heck do we care? Yaar, life is too short for me to be writing this post and for you to be reading it. Go hold hands with someone. Now.

Jury: Dismissed.

Sa Re Ga Ma Pa 2007: Back to Basics

2007-10-01T11:06:00.000-05:00

There are two things about SRGMP that make it a compelling show to watch. First, there is the great singing. And second, there is a laugh-a-minute circus atmosphere. The last two episodes captured both those elements in their full glory. And the reason for that is in the excellent selection of celebrity judges - whose personalities brought out the best in the show. In the end even Farah Khan obliquely admitted that Indian Idol couldn't possibly compete with the singing on SRGMP.

Pandit Jasraj kicked off the weekend with a rendition that sounded like it was borne from the elements itself. And then came Jagjit Singh. Now perhaps his ability to attract hordes of swooning females is the cause of my Jagjit envy, but I've never warmed up to him. Perhaps its because he reminds me of the other bagalthela types - Javed Akhtar, or perhaps because he kept changing the lyrics and singing the same ghazal all his life. In any case, my inability to appreciate Jagjit Singh is probably my misfortune. But along with Pandit Jasraj, wearing an outfit reminiscent of Rajesh Khanna: the middle-aged version - he made a terrific judge.

And the gravitas lent to the show by these two kept Himesh in check and inspired the contestants to sing superbly. Only Aneek delivered a weakish performance but followed it up with a massive rendition of Manna Dey's "Laaga chunari mein daag".

There was more sobbing around Poonam (even Himesh cried!) and in general, the show wound up tamely. This is all well and good, I told myself, but any more shows like this and in proverbial SRGMP style, I'll impale myself on a toothpick.

Fortunately, normal service was resumed when Farah Khan, Deepika Padukone and Shreyas Talpade showed up to shill for Om Shanti Om. One good looking girl, one favorable comment and Himesh grabbed the mike and was off to the races. Copious chatoing ensued. Farah Khan and Deepika chatoed Himesh right back.

Deepika was thrown on stage multiple times, each time swallowing hard and riding this regularly amusing SRGMP moment with grace. At one point, she even tried to hand out an impromptu waltz lesson to Aneek.

Even more rousing singing took place. Raja, Aneek and Amanat - now down to the last three - ploughed through song after song with verve. Aneek imitated Himesh in fine style. Finding himself next to the lovely Deepika, Shekhar copped a feel. Shahrukh Khan did a previously recorded segment with style and handed out songs to sing.

In between Himesh stepped up to the plate, put himself on the line and entertained the living daylights out of me.

First, he hailed Raja as the best singer on the show. Then in a move that didn't quite come off as he might have intended, he tried to put the momentum back behind Aneek. Later, he stood around awkwardly on stage while everyone else danced. On the show Farah Khan called him the Number One Positive Energy. I'm not sure what it means, but it sounds perfect!

Also:

Megan switches loyalties to Ranbir and gets the skinny on Poonam from Vishal

anu g tells us about a report that says TV channels place bets with international bookies to decide the fate of the finalists and reports on the latest with Himesh and Jagjit

Vaishali's 8-year-old develops an Aneek chant

Joules has something to say about Deepika's accent and saree

Kanan is bowled over by Deepika but wonders about SRK's silly ponytail

Priti is thrilled Vishal Shekhar finally let their hair down

Manish's captioned take on these episodes via Megan

Dave has a deep appreciation of Himesh's entertainment value

Mind Rush contemplates analyzing Shekhar's hand grab of Deepika

Megan points us to Shekhar cozying up with Himanshu

minnie tells us Himesh's accusing Vishal-Shekhar of favoritism was in poor taste

Feelings relives a hilarious moment with Aneek and Shekhar on the show

dockaul composes tremendous shayari in the yaad of Mussarat

Sidekick points out that Amanat is not getting his due on the show

Saritha wants to beat up Himesh

And girlie girl would like to join her

Sa Re Ga Ma Pa Challenge 2007: Bye Bye Bleeng Bleeng

2007-09-25T06:31:00.000-05:00

These days I am filled with admiration for Aneek Dhar. Why? For one, there is that terrible moniker he has to live: Royal Cub of Bengal. It gets thrown in his face several times a show. Then he has to live with being Himesh Reshammiya's chela - a feat that must surely require Gandhian levels of tolerance. And then, his guru puts tons of pressure on the poor lad every time he comes out to sing. "Romance karo" he orders. "Sing your best otherwise you're gone" he threatens. And Aneek walks up and cranks out one terrific performance after another - all in good humor without missing a beat. Someone make the guy the coach of the Indian cricket team!

In a new episode of the ongoing jhagda about variety versus roti, Vishal finally picked up the mike and decided to have a go at the House of Reshammiya. This was an ill-concieved move. Because it was nearly not as well plotted as anything Himesh would have done. And because it was a disorganized attack, Himesh - I'm afraid to say - had Vishal for lunch.

Here is what my phaltu advice to Vishal would be: focus on judging the contestants - if Poonam sucks for example, dress her down instead of giving her perfect marks. If Aneek isn't good, call him on it. If he kicks ass, praise him and move on. To be inconsistent is courting ridicule. To tangle with Himanshu is inviting disaster. In all of this though I can't help get the feeling that Amanat might just end up as the biggest gainer.

On to Kareena Kapoor's appearance to shill for her new meet-cute movie Jab We Met - which minus Shahid Kapoor in the promos looks about as inviting as a sauna in the Rann of Kutchh. Nervous, self-conscious, and fighting a constant battle to keep her off-shoulder dress above the boob-line, she drove the Drift Memsaab to exclaim "How does she manage to act!?"

There were two supremely funny moments in the Kareena episode - and neither came during her chamchaagiri of Himesh - a sure sign of the man's rising clout in Bollywood. First, Head decided to join Aneek and Kareena on stage. Himesh promptly jumped up and dragged the poor host off, making sure his chela got the spotlight. "Yes Sir" you could hear Head over his live mike as he scurried for cover.

And then Kareena had to distribute newly released CDs to the audience and the poor emaciated girl could barely toss the pieces - her expressions indicating where they might have landed - short of the first row. Enter Vishal Dadlani - who probably took out a couple of fans with his throws.

Yet the glittery, wrapped gifts that the singers presented to her touched me. And so did that tiny cake wheeled out to celebrate her birthday that could barely accommodate any candles (Happy 10th Birthday, Kareena)

Now, if we are to believe everything on the show, the lack of cellular coverage in Chhattisgarh resulted in the exit of Sumedha Karmahe urf the Bhritni Spheyar of India - purveyor of fine if somewhat choppy and occasionally shrill singing. I'm not sure of the rules but this apparently resulted in Bappida making his exit from the show. A hilarious montage of Bappi's time on the show was spliced in. This included Bappi on a humongous chariot drawn by two puffing horses - an image that will be indelibly seared in my mind forever.

To all of this I cry Foul! I will sorely miss Bleeng Bleengdas style and panache. Vishal-Shekhar will miss their ally. To think that he went without once singing one of my all-time favorites - the incredibly sexy Mosem hey ganey ka. Sob!

Also:

Leera points us to this crazy Aneek clip on Hungama

Megan gives us the skinny on Shekhar's fainting

Priti and Ritha applaud Vishal sticking it to Himesh

Anu g tells us Deepika Padukone and Farah Khan will on SRGMP this week. And about Poonam's adopted baby.

Ritha digs up info on the Saawariya team appearing on VoI this weekend

Megan predicts how Himesh will chato the Om Shanti Om team on the upcoming SRGMP

Manish asks if someone can adopt Himesh

The roughhousing of Raja Hasan

2007-09-21T07:37:00.000-05:00

This summer, the Drift Memsaab was touring the lower Himalayas with my 8 year old son, MotorSandal when a coal-black bhes materialized from behind a bush and emitted a foghorn-like bellow. Motorsandal immediately froze and asked "M-m-mom! Is that a dinosaur?"

My amusement at hearing this anecdote was tinged with regret. Because by living my life as a city slicker I feel constantly guilty that I'm depriving my kids of the simple life, where kids (like me) lived the clean, nature-bhari, uncomplicated life and played with one toy and wore the same "new" shirt all year before asking for another.

This same sense of disenfranchisement draws people like me to uncomplicated singers like Raja Hasan (or Prashant Tamang for that matter).

Early on, when Raja Hasan was part of the deliciously tackily named Eklavya gharana (the gharana with no gurus) he was an unknown quantity. But he was called upon to fill a gap and his singing was nothing short of revelatory. Just as he emerged as a strong singer, Kalyanji showed up as a rather stern mahaguru and inexplicably sent him packing.

Thankfully Vishal-Shekhar used the wildcardashtra and restored him back to the show. And he went from strength to strength becoming as the House of Reshammiya put it "the most hyped singer of the show". Combining a huge voice with an innate ability to find and grab the emotion in the song, he delivered several fine and entertaining performances. He came across as simple, gracious, diplomatic, friendly and respectful. This helped him garner top votes in the early rounds

But then... (and at this point in true SRGMP style, this entire blog would go black and white and you would hear a sonic swoosh) the tide turned for Raja Hasan.

First, he was called for forgetting lyrics. Once the camera (and Shekhar) caught him reading lyrics off his palm in the middle of a performance, reminding me of my friend in school - lovingly called Piston for reasons I'd much rather not go into here - in the middle of an exam.

Then the whole nek insaan bit got a little old. As in all weekly reality contests, your popularity ebbs and flow. Its no fault of the contestants, just the natural momentum of audience fickleness. Add to this that straight face he made whenever something positive was said, as if to say "I'm so seedha I can't comprehend praise", which got to some people.

Finally, Himesh, sensing that his chela Aneek needed some path clearing promptly got to work on Raja. First, castigating him publicly for messing up a song and then in a confounding turn of events virtually blaming him for the eviction of Mussarat Abbas. All this reduced Raja to a vocal hobble when we saw him last week. Even Vishal and Shekhar felt obligated to fake-praise his ordinary singing in an effort to boost their last chela in the competition.

There are rumors that he finished top of the class in this week's upcoming episode. But regardless of the outcome, with Aneek delivering tremendous singing on demand, Poonam winning audiences over with her range and Amanat barely making mistakes, Raja has now become the one to watch. Will the train blow past the station or will it end up in a wreck?

Visions of Mauli Dave, although this one sings a lot better!

Also:

Vaishali laments the show becoming SaReDRAMA

Anonymous wants to rip off an arm just so it can be thrown at Himesh

Sa Re Ga Ma Pa is one hot show

2007-09-20T11:00:00.000-05:00

Hey was it just me or did anyone else notice how sweaty the contestants were in the black and white episode. What happened? The air conditioning couldn't keep up with the bag of hot air that we know to be Himesh Reshammiya? Or did Head sign a movie igniting his career?

Doesn't matter - it was fun to watch in a rather uncomfortable sort of way. New episode, another type of thrill. That's why SRGMP is so uttam.

And in the middle of all of this Himesh unveiled his new look bearing a skull cap. Now these kanya topis remind me of shivering chowkidars in India trying their best to keep warm in winters and looking like a burgler could kick their ass by just waving a fan. One can only imagine how sweaty Himesh's hair (3 at last count) must be getting under there.

Ismail Darbar, your chamchaagiri is being tested! Time to change your seat.

Also:

anu g thinks the cap is a greenhouse for growing hair

Anon gets frustrated that Himesh is messing around with poor Aneek

Anu g points us to an interview with Head and another with Aneek, both worth reading

Saas Bahu sankat comes to Sa Re Ga Ma Pa Challenge 2007

2007-09-17T14:39:00.000-05:00

SRGMP has always had its roots in saas-bahu serials - its narrative powered by jazbaat and drama. Mussarat has been an object of dispute on this show. These two came together with a crackle last week and resulted in a jhagda that shook one contestant to the core and made Himesh Reshammiya look like a saas-bahu villian.

Here's how it went down. Mussarat sings songs in only one jonar - most people call it sufi, but its really a wide range of shababi stuff. And Vishal has endlessly needled him to bring more variety to his singing in order to prove his talent. This is something that has repeatedly gotten Himesh's goat because it tends to eat into Mussy's votes even when the man sings his heart out.

Faced with the prospect of Mussarat losing to Vishal-Shekhar's own chela Raja Hasan, Himesh got progressively more sullen on the show. Add to this the fact that Raja delivered a very ordinary (by his own standards, to be fair) rendition of "Hum The Woh Thi" from Chalti Ka Naam Gadi and his gurus - under pressure to save their last contestant in the show - promptly and rather amusingly leaped on stage and tried to fake a "great Raja performance".

Now I can understand Bappi joining them on stage but when long-standing Himesh chamchaa Ismail also bounded up there with them, it must have left the House of Reshammiya fuming. Later, he rather reluctantly joined the rest on stage and added some meaningless banter to the proceedings.

But when the show culminated in Mussarat getting kicked out, Himesh couldn't control his temper and out come the saas-bahu taanes. This was rather hilariously exploited by the SRGMP producers with their black and white crisis cam. For a while Vishal tried to defend a visibly striken Raja. Bappi tried to correlate all of this to the cataclysmic injustice handed out to Mauli and noted how unfair this duniya is. Himesh promptly shut him down. Mussarat looked like he wanted to be on a plane back home already.

So shaken was Raja that in the next show he veritably croaked out "Tenu Le Ke" from Salaam-e-Ishq. This doesn't bode well for the man - who at one point was clearly coasting on his status as the most bravura singer of the show. Interestingly the question now becomes: should he play it safe and stick to his genre to regain past glory or should he continue to explore his versatility and risk it all? In other words, to survive Raja might have to prove Himesh right and his own mentor wrong. Wah! Kya Bollywood twist hai!

More doses of Himesh were to come. This time over the ghasa-pita Aneek Sumedha one-sided romance. This reminded me of one of my closest classmates - fondly called Bond - who had multiple romances going on for years with girls who barely knew he existed. He even celebrated their birthdays and tracked their performances in exams down to marks breakdown by subject. And Aneek seems to be doing that. I wouldn't be surprised if he had turned out to be Lalloo Prasad Yadav's son, so deft is he in tweaking a potentially beneficial situation.

In any case: on to the singing. Aneek continues to be my favorite - probably more so because he could be the next Himesh Reshammiya in terms of being a continuous cheese-fest. His ability to fill his lungs to capacity in about 2 nanoseconds between lyrics in a song still amazes me. Sumedha sang beautifully but the shrillness in her voice turns me off every now and then. Poonam - whose sad-sack kahani is the cause of debate everywhere, no doubt fueled by the SRGMP media team itself - sang both her songs superbly although her song selection sometimes puts me to sleep. Amanat continued his upward trend of delivering entertaining performances.

Also:

anu g points us to this interview with Shekhar where he riffs on SRGMP as a saas-bahu circus and predicts Himesh's upcoming strategy

Sidekick has some advice for Sumedha and all the girls on the show

Mind Rush's marvellous theory on why Himesh is pushing Aneek as Romeo

Megan dreams of Himesh's peachy pink castle and hooks up with Kunal Khemu

SRGMP spoof from Megan

Priti imagines a Himesh-free future

Sania would like you to join her campaign to kick Himesh off the show

Himesh Besharmiya declared brain dead on rajahasan.com

Himesh the Hirsute

2007-09-14T11:31:00.000-05:00

I get asked quite a bit about Himesh's bal (since you know this blog is in danger of becoming a quirky fan site of the Nasal One).

So here - with many thanks to Saritha for unearthing the SRGMP video. Our man looks dashingly nerdy, no?

Also be sure to check out Sania's superb screen cap of Himesh with hair.